NaNoWriMo starts November the first!

  And here I am: Sarah E.N.!!

  I am entering this contest for the first time ever! I don't expect to really get 50k, but I will try. I'll be trying to finish Redemption.

  Not sure what NaNoWriMo is? Let me explain. It stands for National Novel Writing Month. Get it? Month. On November first, would-be writers all over the country will sit down with laptops, word processors, pens and paper, and typewriters! Many will pull all-nighters, drinking whole pots of coffee, to write their novels.

  The rules say to start with a new story and write without editing. Fortunately, I know a guy *wink.* Evan has done this before, and he told me (and the other new guys) that it's okay to use a story you've been working on already so long as you don't count the parts you had before November 1st. Redemption has twelve chapters and almost twenty thousand words, a total of seventy-three pages.

  So wish me luck! On November first, I will enter the Internet for only three things:

1. Youtube - Gotta have my music, and I don't own all that I need for "noveling," as the NaNoWriMo website puts it.
2. Research - I think I have it all down, but you never know. I may need to look up a type of gun for Angel or a car for Nathan.
3. The NaNoWriMo 2011 first-timers support group on Facebook - Hopefully, Evan will be on at some point. Maybe. Probably not.

  Other than that, the Internet will be OFF. Did you know you could turn it off? You can. It's crazy. So, November! Be there, or be square. (And no, it is not hip to be square. Get it right, Huey.)

I hope John Gacy Jr. rots in Hell

This post is offensive and sick. Don't read it if you can't handle it.

  I know there are disgusting, evil, vile people in this world. I know that. I read about Jeffrey Lionel Dahmer and a bunch of others, and I know even more fictional-but-based-on-real-life serial killers.

  But you know what? It doesn't matter. Because when I heard of a guy named John Wayne Gacy, I thought the name was interesting, so I had to Wikipedia him. Serial killer, clown outfit, rapist, etc. I'm unfazed. And then I reach the list of victims.

  It's just a list of names and numbers, but it strikes a chord. I can't focus on anything else, can't think about my stories. I can only think about these names. I can only stare at them.

Timothy McCoy (15) January 3, 1972 John Butkovitch (17) July 29, 1975 Darrell Sampson (18) April 6, 1976 Randall Reffett (15) May 14, 1976 Samuel Stapleton (14) May 14, 1976 Michael Bonnin (17) June 3, 1976 William Carroll (16) June 13, 1976 Rick Johnston (17) August 6, 1976 Kenneth Parker (16) October 24, 1976

Michael Marino (14) October 24, 1976 Gregory Godzik (17) December 12, 1976 John Szyc (19) January 20, 1977 Jon Prestidge (20) March 15, 1977 Matthew Bowman (19) July 5, 1977 Robert Gilroy (18) September 15, 1977 John Mowery (19) September 25, 1977 Russell Nelson (21) October 17, 1977 Robert Winch (16) November 10, 1977

Tommy Boling (20) November 18, 1977 David Talsma (19) December 9, 1977 William Kindred (19) February 16, 1978 Timothy O' Rourke (20) June 16–23, 1978 Frank Landingin (19) November 4, 1978 James Mazzara (21) November 24, 1978 Robert Piest (15) December 11, 1978

  Then there are eight more that are unnamed. Eight boys from ages 15 to 25 were killed by this man, and no one knows who they are. Six days ago, they exhumed the bodies and began testing DNA, but still. Can you imagine being a mother of a missing boy during that time? You find out that eight boys have been found but not identified, and you are suddenly sure that your son is among them.

  So I started reading more about this killer. According to Wikipedia, John Wayne Gacy Jr. raped and killed thirty-three teenage boys to young men, burying them in the crawlspace of his house and in his yard. He worked in fast food restaurants and dressed as a clown for charity events. At one point, he was married with children, but after being arrested for sexual assault, his wife left him and took his kids. His son's name was Michael.

  Michael Marino was one of his later victims. It wasn't his son, but it bothered me immensely when I noticed this. This was the name that I had given the most attention because he was only fourteen. So very young.

  These were children that he raped and murdered in his home, then buried in the crawlspace. It's so very sick and disturbing, so... My regular phrases don't apply here; they don't fit. This is the sh** that terrifies me when I think of bringing children into this fu**ed up world.

  I pray that God takes mercy on the souls of these poor children. And I hope that the black soul of John Wayne Gacy currently resides in the worst torment, the kind that no one on earth could ever imagine.

When did seventeen start meaning OLD?

My tastes have matured,
but they haven't really changed.

  I discovered Youtube when I was about twelve or thirteen. I was still new at surfing through the videos, and I remember those days when I was cute and favorited videos of jets because they had clips of my favorite songs in them. Heh, I was so cute...

  Anyway, even back then, I liked boys. Really liked boys. I also liked Harry Potter, which meant that I fell for... Can anyone guess? Draco Malfoy! The bad boy with the blond hair and (sometimes) a longing to be good. I still like those types, as you can see. That picture over there is my current and probably longest-lasting actor crush, not counting Robert Downey Jr.

Anyway, I used to watch the same video over and over. Britney Spears's "Toxic" played while images of Draco flashed past me. I was practically bouncing as I watched, even though I didn't really understand that lusty feeling back then. I was a child.

But the thing is, he was a child too. I found the video again tonight and decided to watch it. It was okay at first because Draco was really mature at fourteen, so those clips were still pretty hot. But then this other scene flashed by. The still-kinda-chubby face of an eleven-year-old boy, one year younger than my baby brother. My eyes did this: O.O

I felt like a pervert watching that video. It was disgusting. Not that I was still interested in him at that age, but the song and the memories of when I was younger... Gah! I've been noticing more and more lately that the boys I used to love are now children. I guess that's why movie/television crushes are so silly; you grow up and they don't. Still, it made me feel old, and that isn't anywhere close to fair!

So here is the actual video. *sigh*

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