Showing posts with label autism. Show all posts
Showing posts with label autism. Show all posts

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Prejudiced parents

  I have recently discovered a new type of prejudice.  By reading two blogs (that hardly makes me an expert, I know) by parents with autistic children, I have learned what some, at least this one and her readers, think of those parents who have what they call "typical" kids.  In this particular post, she writes that "Typical Parents Are a Bunch of Drunken Pussies." (If you don't understand this, please don't look it up.)
  This sickens me. And it isn't just one post; she is constantly bashing "typical" parents and their "angelic" kids. She has this air of, "My life is harder, so I can say whatever I want," about her writing.
WRONG.
  Life is not about who has it the worst. No one can judge that. For example, I know it's hard raising an autistic child, but is it really harder than raising my sister? The girl who started dating (which means, of course, going behind my parents' backs with boys) when she was in elementary school. The girl who snuck out at all hours of the night to be with the boyfriend who was four years older than her. The one who blank-faced lied to her parents, cursed at her mother (a cardinal sin in my book), hit her little sister (that would be me), and did everything else she could to provoke. Why? Her biological father, a sociopath and a druggie, left when she was three. Not because her mother remarried to a good-hearted, Christian man who loved them both with his whole heart. And you think my parents had it easy?  Now this one riles me. With this post, "typical" parents are reduced to ignorant jerks. Just because someone is blessed doesn't mean that he or she doesn't sympathize with your situation! There are ignorant Philistines out there who think that autism is just faulty parenting, but you cannot judge everyone by the few morons.
  And this. That comment by j* made me so incredibly upset. "Typical" parents have it easy, huh? Why are "typical" parents so unhappy?
  Because, creep, we all live in the same devastating world with the same terrible problems. Do you want to know why my mama took "happy pills" for a while? I was eleven in 2005, but I remember the grief around me after my aunt died. She was my father's big sissy and my mother's best friend since school. That means they were friends for more years than I care to count.
  Same year, quite soon after my aunt's sudden death (in which she left behind four children, three of them minors, and many, many loved ones), my sister moved out. Eighteen, just graduated, and angry at the world, she barely came around the house anymore. She got a "roommate" named Jessica, and they later "came out." Now, she got over that phase relatively quick and went back to men, not that her choices with them were much better.  (Now, I love my sister, and she has really turned her life around.  I forgive her choices, and I know that God does too, so there is no more judgement here, only a stating of facts.)
  So all of this is going on, and my parents get some medication from their doctor. Because they're DEPRESSED. And, no, they don't have any autistic children. Do you still think your life is harder? Still think you have more stress?
  Thankfully, we have Jesus to level us out, but that doesn't mean that life is a cakewalk. This prejudice against "typical" people has me shaking with anger, just like almost all other prejudices will do to me. You have a right to your own opinion, but treat others around with the respect that all human beings deserve. That is the only way to ensure tolerance and a fair world, which we all long for, even if it is in secret

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Autism awareness

  I have been afraid for years that I have either Asperger's syndrome or a form of autism.  Well, "afraid" is a loose term for it.
  When I first thought, maybe, I wouldn't accept it.  After watching the movie Adam, I was terrified of having something wrong with me, and it still bothers me some.  Then, I made a friend (who's name, strangely, is also Adam), and he has Asperger's.  Now, I've come to accept the fact that it may not be a bad thing (plus, if it is true, I was born with it. Nothing has changed for me).  People with Asperger's, or "Aspies," as they're called, are usually extra intelligent, specializing in one area (for me, that's language).  I think I am an Aspie, but there are varying degrees of this syndrome.  Some don't experience as many side affects as others.
  I believe I have this syndrome because of the strange... things I do.  Or have been told that I do anyway.  Apparently, I take things completely literally (if you didn't mean it, why say it?), make noises in my throat or with my nose (these, I sometimes notice, and I hate when people point them out), am bothered my sounds like whistling (whistling. It's demonic music), and "stim," as it's called.  The noises I make are also a part of this, and stimming is just... something autistic people do.  Funny repetitive movements (you've seen the rocking on television, but there are many other kinds), noises, anything with a pattern or mentally stimulating.  I also have problems related to OCD, and mental disorders tend to go together.
  My problem now is that I have never been tested.  I've taken the online tests and made high scores, but those are just for fun really.  I want to see a psychiatrist so that I can finally now for sure whether I am an Aspie or not.  The problem is money and of course... asking my parents.  I know they would understand (my dad is very like me, so he may have it too), but I don't want to ask.  It's hard to explain.
  Until I've been tested, I don't want to call myself an Aspie or autistic.  Here's my reasoning:
  Has anyone ever told you that he or she had ADD or ADHD?  Did you believer him or her?  I give the benefit of the doubt, but I probably would not believe that person.
  If we degrade the term "autistic," no one will believe them either.  We'll have perfectly normal kids being treated for something they don't have while suffering children are being ignored and feeling very out of place (believe me, it's hard to understand why the world doesn't work the way you do).
  I think I have Asperger's syndrome.  But I refuse to say it for sure until I am tested because I wish to show respect to people who truly have problems.

Check out these to understand what parents or autistic kids deal with every day: